Tuesday, November 20, 2007

T Minus 47.5 Hours

Thanksgiving Dinner will be served in less than 48 hours. As of right now:

  • there is a styrofoam solar system drying on my kitchen counter
  • several piles of various... stuff... lying on the same kitchen counter
  • a half-done list of chores on another counter
  • a "cleaned" bathroom that needs to be recleaned under adult supervision
  • a toddler in need of a bath
  • a baby in need of a bath
  • a semi-thawed turkey for which I can't find a container to brine it in
  • a patio that hasn't been swept in a month
  • I have a raging headache
  • the ever-growing Mount Washmore seems to be taking over the laundry room/pantry
Amazingly enough I am not stressed out. I am wondering how I will get everything done to my satisfaction, but I'm not stressed. Off to supervise bathroom cleaning yet again...

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Evidence of Work Avoidance

If you notice any of these things, be assured that there is Work Avoidance happening in the vicinity:

A 12 year old and 7 year old found watching Thomas the Tank Engine in rapt silence.

A screensaver bouncing across a 12 year old's computer while wild whooping sounds emanate from the backyard.

Cooing and giggling heard in the living room whilst you read aloud in the kitchen tales of martyrs being hanged, drawn and quartered. Upon glancing up, you notice your audience is suspiciously absent.

Your child is at least a week behind on assignments, yet amazingly has the time and patience to sit with his baby sibling and attempt to teach her to walk.


Last night, Our Fearless Leader and I were watching a show about monsters on the History Channel. I finally gave up and went to bed before it was over (18 hour days will make a person a little bit tired). At breakfast, we were talking about the results of a DNA test done on "samples" taken from a bed of screws placed in the doorway of a cabin in a remote forest of Canada. It turns out the DNA was sent to two labs and both reported that the samples were primate in origin, but not human. Ooooooooh. (Cue spooky music.) Our Fearless Leader declared that Sasquatch must be real (and we giggled about it).

A few minutes later, the Yet-to-be-Named Wonder Child was making bold statements of the truth....

Squishsquash is real!!!!!!

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Wonder Girl Strikes Again

This time it was the stairs. I was watching just out of her sight. Up... two... three... four... and she would have kept right on climbing without intervention.

Then it was the recycled trash can. Not only can the entire wastebasket be used as a walking aide, it also is a handy way to tote around fun toys - stuff like pop cans, papers of all shapes and colors, boxes and loads of other nifty items. Mominator is such a stick in the mud, though, and always seems to interrupt the fun.

Railroading accidents have become commonplace in the living room. Poor Thomas the Tank Engine probably knows more about Miss M's oral hygiene than I do.

Now then... where DID I put that baby gate?

Sunday, November 4, 2007


My fortune cookie fortune from today's Sunday dinner says this:

It's over your head now.
Time to get some professional help.

Um.... ouch?

Naps Are Eeeeeeevil

Whatever you do, do NOT allow your Wonder Children to nap. Ever.

Yesterday Our Fearless Leader sent me off for a mid-day shopping escapade with the Quilting Bee (that would be my mother). The Quilting Bee and I had a grand time gallavanting about the mall - a place I've not set foot in for at least a year or so. When I called to ask the older children to be ready to head out the door for Mass upon my return home, I heard that Wonder Boy had fallen asleep, snuggled up to Our Fearless Leader. It was just a 30 minute nap.

Bedtime just didn't come soon enough after that. Wonder Boy took the nap and a Wild, Fussy Beast woke up in his stead. Unfortunately for me, the mall closes at 9pm... I might have run away if given the opportunity.

Friday, November 2, 2007

Can I Eat That?

The answer to this question is always "no."

Even for Mommy. A.L.W.A.Y.S. If you have to ask, the answer is no. Every time. No matter what. Without a doubt. Undoubtedly. Uh-uh. No way. NO!

Guess who ate cheese pizza and is paying dearly for the dairy escapade?

Thursday, November 1, 2007



Say it's not so! Please!

Miss M has left a path of destruction in her wake. Among the casualties today: Wonder Boy's painstakingly constructed train track; the floor of our school room; the back of a piece of framed art I've had yet to hang; the cups & bowls cabinet; the diaper cabinet; the playdough remnants accidentally left on the floor (by the way, playdough does, indeed, seem to be non-toxic); my computer keyboard; and the dog's food & water. And this was with supervision!